Halle Berry has won an Oscar for her role in “Monster’s Ball” back in 2001. But then she got a Razzy award for her terrible acting in “Catwoman” just a few years later. So, her work is really all over the place. Now she is starring in “Kidnap” and the results are a bit dubious. Berry may hope for another Oscar nod someday, but she will not get one for this car wreck of a movie. Literally, a good half of the run time is her driving like a maniac causing and being in many car wrecks…
Karla (Halle Berry) has a six-year-old son named Frankie (Sage Correa). She is in a custody battle with her ex, and her son is the best thing in her life. She and Frankie go to the park, and she takes a phone call from her lawyer. Her phone battery is almost dead, and she gets emotional when she hears that the ex wants sole custody. But when the phone dies, she turns around and see Frankie is missing. She asks several people about her boy, and nobody knows where he went. Then she sees him across the parking lot being dragged off by a large lady who is putting him in a battered car. She gets to the lot and the car takes off, so she gets her minivan in hot pursuit.
At this early point in the movie, the ridiculous factor kicks into high gear. Two kidnappers plus Frankie are going to be chased by Karla and her minivan for about half the movie. They cause numerous accidents and possibly a couple of fatalities. Even when a motorcycle cop catches up to Karla’s bad driving, the bad guys dispatch him with no problem. There is an unbelievable showdown between Karla and the male kidnapper named Terry (Lew Temple). His accomplice, the large lady named Margo (Chris McGinn) will ride with Karla to take her to the destination. This does not end well for Margo, who winds up on the side of the road.
Karla keeps after the car to try and get Frankie back. But there are more accidents and hit-and-runs, then Terry hot-wires a new getaway car. But Karla continues to chase them even when she runs out of gas. By the way, the movie ran out of gas much earlier than she did. Karla somehow finds a house where Frankie is being held, and by that time, Terry is out of the picture and Margo is back at the house. So, there must be a final showdown with Karla and Margo. Karla has caused countless accidents, injuries and more than a few fatalities, but she must prevail and be declared a hero – damn it!
Halle Berry plays a brain-dead character here, so that does not help her at all. Karla will literally stop at nothing, driving her minivan into all kinds of traffic violations. She has no depth and no clever ideas about how to combat the kidnappers. She seems to use a ‘spidey-sense’ to know where the bad guys go, because she never uses any logic or serious thinking. Karla just never gives up, but never makes any smart choices either. Halle plays her as determined, but dumb. It is amazing how much damage is done in the wake of Karla’s pursuit.
There is no other acting as such in the movie, just a few characters up on the screen playing the worst stereotypes ever. There is little in the way of plot, other than making Karla into a ‘Mad Max in a Minivan’. The editing and shot selection are rough and choppy. It is difficult to get a sense of place or direction when the scenes are cut together so awkwardly. There are several somewhat suspenseful scenes near the end, but these seem to come from a different movie. The final wrap-up is pretty bad, declaring Karla a hero, when she was responsible for several deaths and untold property damage.
The hashtag line for this movie is “#DontMessWithMom”. I would suggest a better one is “#DontMessWithLogic” or “#DontMessWithPlot”.
