Madame Web Movie Review

“Madame Web” is movie based on a comic-book character in the ‘Spider-Man adjacent’ universe. But it is not based off of one of the well-known or popular ones. This is about a minor character that can see – into the future?

Back in 1973, there is woman in the jungles of Peru. It is Constance Webb (played by Kerry Bishé), and she is very pregnant. She is looking for a special breed of spider that has potent venom that has been known to have healing powers. She wants her unborn girl to be healed of a genetic illness. Her main guide is a man named Ezekiel Sims (played by Tahar Rahim).

When the spider is found, Ezekiel turns on and kills all of the others in the party and steals the spider. Constance is also shot and is near death. Local tribal people who have used the spider’s venom come down from the trees to take her away to a special healing pool in a cave. Constance gives birth to a baby girl, and then dies in childbirth. The locals take care of the baby and get her back to the United States.

It turns quickly to 2003, and there is a paramedic team in an ambulance driving through New York City. The driver is Cassandra ‘Cassie’ Webb (played by Dakota Johnson), the daughter born in a Peruvian jungle. Her partner, and fellow EMT, is Ben Parker (played by Adam Scott). They are always going from disaster to disaster to save lives. One fateful day, Cassie saves a man in a car on the bridge.

The car falls off the bridge with Cassie inside. She is clinically dead for a few minutes. In that time, she sees visions of many events, from the past and into the future. She is revived by Ben, and says she is OK. But inside, she knows that something different is going on. Later, she has a vision of the Fire Captain going to drive away, and then be killed in a crash.  What she has foreseen comes true only minutes later.

Cassie is very confused about what she is seeing. Are they visions of the real events are about to unfold? Or are these things premonitions of what might come to pass? Unknown to Cassie, there is another person in NYC that is having some paranormal visions. It is the same Ezekiel Sims, who thirty years ago killed her mother and made of with that special spider.

Sims has used the spider venom for all these years to become a powerful man. He has money and wealth, due to all of his super-human spider powers that he picked up from years of venom injections. Sims has nightmares of three other powerful spider-enhanced women coming after him. This has made him focused on finding these three girls now, while they are teenagers. That way, he can kill them before they all team up to kill him.

These three younger teenagers are also in the city, and all happen to be at the same place at the same time. Cassie Webb is also there at the train station, when she sees these three high-school students. Julia Cornwall (played by Sydney Sweeney), is one of them – a cute blond with geeky glasses. Anya Corazon (played by Isabela Merced) is there on the same train — and Cassie recognizes her from her apartment building. Mattie Franklin (played by Celeste O’Connor) is the third girl, and she does not know any of the others.

Ezekiel Sims has hired a security agent who uses top-secret NSA technology to all of these girls together. Sims feels that this is his perfect time to attack. There will be nobody around to save these girls. Of course, he does not know that Cassie is having visions of what Sims is about to do. Cassie is able to get all three of these girls away safely.

Cassie ‘borrows’ a taxicab, and swiftly gets Mattie, Julia, and Anya to a safe distant location in the woods. But Cassie is not a super-hero or anything. She does not know what is going on any more than the three girls. She decides to go back home and do some research, all while leaving the three girls behind in the woods.

The girls ditch the campsite and hike over to local diner. They, of course, are located by Ezekiel Sims, who is wearing an evil black ‘Spider-Guy’ outfit. Cassie is back in time to save the girls (yet again).

They all stay at motel for a night, where Cassie uses her EMT training to teach them all CPR. Cassie has visions of her meeting and talking with Ezekiel Sims. She learns of his super ‘spider-powers’ when he explains his years of venom usage. He must track down and kill all three of these girls now, because in the future — they will come after him.

For some reason, Cassie feels that now is the best time for her to leave and go visit — Peru? Yes, her plan is to meet up with local tribal leaders who saved her when she was born. These three girls will have to hang out for a few days, but not by themselves. So, she enlists her fellow EMT Ben Parker, and his wife Mary. Mary is quite pregnant, but I’m sure that is not going to come into play. For some reason, Ben and Mary agree to let Anya, Mattie and Julia stay with them.

But hey – to get Great Power, you need to establish Great Responsibility… Or something like that. Why would Cassie decide that now is a good time to visit Peru? And will happen if Ezekiel Sims finds out that Ben and Mary are hiding the girls that he is looking for? Julia, Mattie, and Anay are not a threat to Sims, at least not now. Why is he so focused on finding them and killing them? What exactly did all those years of spider juice to the man? What unknown powers might Cassie have unlocked from within her?

So there is nothing more to do than have a Final Act super-powered showdown. And stage that fight in the middle of an abandoned fireworks storehouse. Cassie, with no powers other than a really good precognition, is going to face-off against Ezekiel Sims.

All of this to save the three girls, Anya, Mattie, and Julia, whom Cassie really only has known for a few days. And Sims has nothing against the three — except what he ‘knows’ they will do to him in the future. Oh, what a Tangled Web…

“Madame Web” is a Marvel comic book character that is now personified in this movie, not made by Marvel. Why? It’s a long story, but Sony Pictures has movie rights to Marvel’s Spider-Man and all related characters. So, the past few (excellent) ‘Spider-Man’ movies have been from Sony. The ‘Venom’ movies have also been made by Sony. But then, there have been duds such as ‘Morbius’, and now ‘Madame Web’…

All the decisions made to make this movie must be second-guessed now by Sony. The end result is a mish-mosh of poorly-conceived characters and plot lines. The acting all throughout is flat and without any emotion. The ADR (dialog recorded after filming) does not match the actor’s lips moving.

The Direction and Cinematography have reached a new level beyond ‘Shakey-Cam”. I would phrase it as “Queezey-Cam”. Seeing all the motion of the camera with the swooping and movement could make you sick. This really breaks up any ‘action’ sequence to nothing more than film stock put into a blender.

“Madame Web” is ‘Spider-Man adjacent’ movie, based on a character with really no Super Powers of her own. Except maybe to get you caught in her tangled and confusing Webb…